The feeling leaves

And a flock of small birds flew in and out of the sycamore trees.

-I should be leaving now, I said. My bus leaves in ten minutes.

Walking down the staircase to my mothers appartment and breathing in the foggy air I realised what was wrong. Everything in my life had turned very real. I never experienced my surroundings in this way before. As a kid they were mearly there as to humor me and to my usage. This notion was almost unfathomable for me. Where had all the magic gone? When did the world stop to orbit me? And maybe, just maybe I wasn't that special selected by the divine person afterall.

As I passed along the gravel path the crackling sound of small rocks and pebbles almost sickened me. This epiphany I got really did complicate mathers for me. Why can't we always feel like when we were childs?

-Death, she said, is a friend and sleep is deaths brother. Don't fall aslepp yet, I'm still cold and I want you present.

Her long dark hair folded out over my chest as we layed naked in bed. After a little while she was sleeping in that same position. But I could not sleep, I half sat up against the wall smoking endless cigaretts and staring into the ceiling. The feeling from earlier had not parted from me. How will I ever live without that feeling? How can life be of any fun now?
Questions, questions, the only thing running thru my mind was questions. No answers arose.
Ah! This is useless! I gently slided Lucy in the sky with diamonds of my chest and tucked her in the blanket. I pulled up my blue denim jeans and pulled my t-shirt on, gave her a gentle kiss then opened the door and walked out in the early morning.