She tied you to her kitchen chair

Next please.
Yes, arhm, I would like a ticket for Pesaro please.
28 euro.
The deal was done, I'm getting on the train to go on a four hour ride thru the italian country side down to the coast, where I can finaly breath some fresh air.
I sit down in a coupé, the train wont leave for another ten minutes. Jesus christ child you scared me. This young gypsy girl is beggig me for money. I give her 30 cents (which was all I had). She's not content with this and starts to do weird throat noises and shows me this green slime/spitt on the tip of her tongue and shoves out her hand for more money. God is she gonna spitt on me? look little girl I don't have anymore money on me, that was it all. With angry eyes she realize that I don't have more money and - I think is about to spit on me- when to my rescue a trainemployee comes and shoves her away.

Strangely I'm not mad or pist off. I'm bewildered about this child, that she is so desperate that she would acctually spit on people if they didn't give her money. - The train takes off -

After a couple hours ride suddenly and ofcourse, the baglady gets into my coupé with a whole weeks edition of newspapers, every single one, Corriere della Sera, Reppublica etc etc. She starts muttering something unrecognizable and picks up some pastries from one of her bags. This woman scares me. She looks like one of those middle-age women that have given up everything to fly of to Ukraine to teach underprivelidge retarded kids in the vicinity of Tjernobly.

Next stop, Pesaro!
Finaly I'm there. I run into Filipo (my model coprostitute for this trip) and we stand around outside the station smoking a joint and waiting for the guy to arrive. Taxi pulls up and this guy jumps out and greets us as Fabio. Off we roar! to a beauty/hairsalon. (Fabio is one of the owners of this asylum for divas as he called it) I'm thinking to myself what the fuck is he on about, there maybe 20 000 people living in this town, how many a-camp queers can there be? By this point Fabio directs us to the solarium part for taning. By the mercy of fucking J this man wont stop going on about how gay he is and well, yeah how gay he is. "You know I'm gay rarararara I only go to gaybars rarara". You're really getting on my fine nerves with that shit man!

We finaly get to the resturant, a nice seafood place just by the water. I'm famished and just want to eat. but noooooo first I have to go around all tables and say hello to every single fucking woman in the resturant - about 50 of them or so -. Ahh food atlast! Nooooo now some latino girl starts raving in the mic about the good old days when boys would ask the girls to dance. "Sooo go one Nicklas and Filipo ask any of these BEAUTIFUL ladies for a dance!". woopdyfuckindoo how much fun! Who should i pick? first one I see, that's good enough. So now I'm dancing slowdance with a pudgy italian girl to some 80'ies revival songs. And all i want to do is just eat and obliberate myself on Jack and Coke. Well that happens soon enough and around two a.m a taxi comes and takes me to the hotel, where I loot the minibar and the bathroom for soap, switch on the TV to some payperview shitty italian porn and fall asleep blissfully.